


tired trying to see

by Kowalski_analysis



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Dead Aunt May, Flashbacks, Fluff, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter not feeling like he belongs, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:41:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21882415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kowalski_analysis/pseuds/Kowalski_analysis
Summary: tem·po·rar·y/ˈtempəˌrerē/Learn to pronounceadjectivelasting for only a limited period of time; not permanent."a temporary job"When Peter loses his faith in permanency, is there hope?
Relationships: Harley Keener & Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), Peter Parker & Pepper Potts, Tony Stark & Peter Parker
Comments: 5
Kudos: 67
Collections: Iron Dad Secret Santa 2019





	tired trying to see

It had been 3 months since he had been brought back. 

It had been 2 months since Tony was released from the hospital because he had healed enough.

It had been a month since Aunt May was killed. Drunk driver, they had said.  
  
It had been three weeks since the funeral.

It had been two weeks since Harley moved in.

It had been a week since Morgan had asked if they were her brothers and Tony replied with, “Yes.”

And there Peter was now, lying on his bed in the dark, hearing Tony kiss Morgan good night. He felt awkward, not knowing where he stood. On one end stood Morgan, the biological child, the baby of the family. On the other end stood Harley, who had known Tony since he was eleven/twelve. In the middle stood Peter himself, a mutant kid from Queens(because that’s who he was despite Tony’s protests) who need an upgrade. When Peter heard the door knob open, he could tell that Tony was staring at him with a look of pity. Tony knew about the frequent nightmares that occured, and especially knew about how he would cry himself to sleep some nights, missing the small apartment in Queens where he never felt as lonely as he did now. 

Sure, having Harley playing Mario Kart every week and Morgan coming into his room with her action figures, begging him to play because Harley claimed Spider-Man and she shouldn't have; was fun, but he felt uncomfortable and like the odd one out when they would do stuff together. Morgan would always go out to get her hair done with Pepper, and Harley would just always work in the lab, but Peter would just be alone on his own. He never felt like he belonged. 

To him, even after living with Tony for a month, he still wasn’t used to FRIDAY waking him up or taking the subway from Midtown to a tower where a billianor lived. A billionare that temporarily had guardianship over Peter. 

Temporary guardianship. That’s what the lawyers had called it at 2am in the hospital as they handed Tony a stack of papers to fill out as Peter sobbed in his shoulder, drenching the fabric of the older man’s shirt with his tears. It’s what Peter told himself when he was given a suit- which was totally expensive by the feel of the fabric- for the funeral. It’s what the walls said when Pepper burst in with buckets of paint and a cheesy grin on her face, followed closely behind by Morgan and Harley who wanted to help decorate.

He learned in kindergarten that nothing in life was permanent. No one but him remembered how it felt when the guidance counselor came into his classroom and whispered something to his teacher who promptly called on him to go outside with her, unaware of the demons that hid behind that door.  
  
“Honey,” the counselor began, biting her lip as she kneeled down to his height, “Your parents are gone. They found them after a plane crash.” His small mind didn’t comprehend what that meant until Aunt May and Uncle Ben picked him up early from school, together, both of them silent as Peter sang to himself, asking when his parents would be back. 

Temporary came up again when he and Ben went out when Peter was around 14. It had been a couple weeks since he had been bitten by a spider at Osborn on his field trip, and had recovered completely from the illness that knocked him out for over a week. He’d discovered that he could stick to things, but his senses had dialed up, maybe to an 11. The first time he smelled perfume after the bite, he’d nearly passed out from the intensity. But, he wished he could have stopped it, that’s how he felt in the hospital, blood on his hands and soaked through his jacket as he waited for May to pick him up. Just him.

Temporary arrived again, as it always did. This time, it was a Wednesday night and Peter was studying for an upcoming history test. May had texted him, letting him know that she was going to pick up Chinese on her way home from her shift. He waited for an hour, calling her a total of four times, just waiting for someone to pick up. And someone did. Someone unfamiliar. They asked who was calling, and who’s phone was this. 

_“I’m Peter! Peter Parker! I’m May Parker’s nephew! She’s a nurse at Forest Hills, I was calling to check on her,” he explained as his hands shook with anxiety and his voice quivered in the slightest. He heard a sharp inhale on the other end, a pause, before rustling was heard._  
  
“May Parker? She was just admitted in, her phone handed to us. She was just in a fatal accident.” Another part of Peter’s world was shattered that day. 

_By the time Tony came into the picture, she was already declared dead, but Peter was still holding her cold hand and whispering to her. His eyes were glassy and red-rimmed when he turned to face the new man in the room. “I-I-”_

A calloused hand running through his hair jolted him from his moments of flashbacks to reality. It was comforting and he leaned into the touch, mumbling something along the lines of, “M’ser S’ar?”

A quiet chuckle arose from the older man as the bed dipped to accommodate him. “Go to sleep kid,” he whispered. 

Craving the love and attention, Peter leaned into Tony’s side, grateful to finally have some one on one time with him, which he needed through the whole grieving process.

“I’m sorry,” Tony said as he stared up at the ceiling. “I haven’t been able to give the time to you that you need, especially with everything going on. But I want to let you know that I’m here for you whenever you need it.” 

Letting out a sound of relief, Peter nodded, finally being able to drift off to sleep. He mumbled something that was almost inaudible before saying it a bit louder.

“I love you dad.”

And if Tony’s heart didn’t immediately skip a beat, he’d be lying.

But maybe some things aren’t always temporary. Maybe they’re permanent. And permanent is always comforting, especially when it’s a family.

**Author's Note:**

> This is super special to me because it’s my work for mala-sadas on tumblr for the Irondad Secret Santa


End file.
